A Realization: My Story On Body Image

August 13, 2010 Ashley Pariseau 9 comments

I was recently honored to be a guest blogger on Happiness Is Within, a blog centered around finding peace with yourself and your body. Dana, the site’s author, features a special section called Love Your Body where she asks guests to contribute their own stories. She emailed me a couple weeks ago asking me to share mine, so I decided to make my debut post on my personal past struggles with body image. Here is the link to my article on her site, but I will go ahead and paste it below.

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The Struggle
Body image is an issue that I feel passionately about. This may be because I have had my own share of struggles with my body. All my life, I have been very thin. Everyone in my immediate family is naturally thin, but I have always been the thinnest out of them. Ever since I can remember, I have heard comments from people about my weight. I knew I was pretty skinny but as a young child, it didn’t bother me much because I figured I would fill out more as a teenager and it wouldn’t be an issue. Well, I was wrong. It really started having an impact on me around age 14. This is when all the other girls in my grade had fully developed. They grew taller and had breasts and hips. I was so much smaller than them in every aspect. But it was my thinness that I was the most bothered by, and people didn’t let me forget how thin I really was. I was called every skinny name in the book. Toothpick. Puny. Stick figure. Olive Oil. That I looked like 10 year old prepubsecent boy, and so on. The names didn’t hurt me as much as the looks of disgust I received accompanied by questions like, “Omg! Do you eat?” and the rumors that flew around that I had an eating disorder.

The more comments that were thrown at me, the worse I felt about myself. I evaluated myself in the mirror and saw what they were all talking about. I was pretty bony and I hated what I saw, but I didn’t understand it because I was eating just as much as everyone else. In fact, I had quite a sweet tooth and I know I took in more calories than most people my age. So why did I look to everyone like I starved myself? It didn’t take long for me to become completely consumed by this. I felt so ugly. I would have given anything to just gain 10 pounds.

After I had let the comments of others go to my head, I started to throw on extra layers of clothes and anything baggy to hide how skinny I was. Wearing jackets and sweaters made it look like there was little more more weight on me. During this time, I tried to eat as much as I could, thinking I could gain some weight. But it was harder than I had expected. My metabolism would just not let me keep weight on and that frustrated me so much.

Taking Back Control
Later I came to a realization. Why do I need to try to change my body? I was perfectly healthy the way I was. Wasn’t that the most important thing? Yes. I knew it was. Then I suddenly remembered the positive comments from people that I had ignored before. I realized that this was the way my body was designed to be. Instead of denying it, I should be embracing it. I also came to notice how I didn’t feel bad about my body until I started hearing the negative comments. I was allowing their words to get inside my head, and I knew it was up to me and me only to block that out and regain the confidence I once had. Little by little, I did just that. It took a little time and lots of inner searching, but I pulled through. I started mentally listing things that I liked about my body and the way I looked. There were a lot of things I could name once I got all the negativity out of my mind. Before long, I could look in the mirror and love what I saw. I could go in public wearing a bikini and feel comfortable, not worrying about the thoughts of others. Let me tell you, that is a wonderful feeling.

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Feel free to leave your comments on either her site on right here. Also, I will be doing more guest posts there on this issue where I will share more stories and offer advice in the near future, so be looking out!

Categories: Causes, Inspiration, Writing

Freckles

August 11, 2010 Ashley Pariseau 1 comment

I used to care so much about what others think about
Almost didn’t have a thought of my own
The slightest remark would make me embark
On the journey of self doubt
But that was a while ago
This girl has got stronger
If I knew then what I know now
I would have told myself don’t worry any longer it’s OK

[Chorus:]
’cause a face without freckles is like a sky without stars
Why waste a second not loving who you are
Those little imperfections make you beautiful, lovable, valuable,
They show your personality inside your heart
Reflecting who you are

Who you are
Who you are
Who you are

I wondered if I could trade my body with somebody else in magazines
Would the whole world fall at my feet?
I felt unworthy and would blame my failures on the ugliness I could see
When the mirror looked at me
Sometimes I feel like the little girl who doesn’t belong in her own world
But I’m getting better
And I’m reminding myself

[Chorus]

Reflecting who you are
Reflecting who you are

Categories: Causes, Inspiration

Taking Care of Your Skin

August 9, 2010 Ashley Pariseau 1 comment

[I wrote this for Associated Content and thought I would share.]

We all know that you should take care of your skin. But you should also take especially care of your skin if you usually wear makeup. If you didn’t already know, makeup isn’t necessarily good for your skin. It’s not really bad for your skin either, unless you are allergic, but here are some general tips on preparing before you put your makeup on.

1. Drink plenty of water. Drinking water hydrates your body, including your skin. It actually contributes to giving you a youthful look. It also prevents dry skin and acne.

2. Eat healthily. Make sure you are getting enough fruits and vegetables. This has a similar effect as water. It helps purify your body and your skin. Oily foods causes clogged arteries. Clogged arteries means bad blood flow which causes bad skin.

3. Change your pillow. This is something you might not even think about, but oil collects on your pillow after you sleep on it night after night. That is often a reason why when you wake up that your face and hair feels greasy.

4. Wash your face. You should wash your face twice a day. Once in the morning and once at night. If you are prone to acne, use a wash that specifically fights it. You might have you try out a few different kinds of facial cleansers to find the type that works best.

5. Moisturize after washing. Some people get really dry skin after taking a hot shower so make sure you use a moisturizer right after your wash your face. Lotions are moisturizers are different. Lotions often have oils while moisturizers don’t so make sure you aren’t using just any lotion.

Categories: Writing

Still Loving You

August 7, 2010 Ashley Pariseau 6 comments

Time, it needs time to win back your love again
I will be there, I will be there
Love, only love can bring back your love someday
I will be there, I will be there

Fight, babe, I’ll fight to win back your love again
I will be there, I will be there
Love, only love can bring down the wall someday
I will be there, I will be there

If we go again all the way from the start
I would try to change the things that killed our love
Your pride has built a wall, so strong that I can’t get through
Is there really no chance to start once again? I’m loving you

Try, baby, try to trust in my love again
I will be there, I will be there
Love, our love just shouldn’t be thrown away
I will be there, I will be there

If we’d go again, all the way from the start
I would try to change the things that killed our love
Your pride has built a wall, so strong that I can’t get through
Is there really no chance to start once again?

If we’d go again, all the way from the start
I would try to change the things that killed our love
Yes, I’ve hurt your pride, and I know what you’ve been through
You should give me a chance, this can’t be the end

I’m still loving you
I’m still loving you
I’m still loving you
I need your love
I’m still loving you
Still loving you

Categories: Inspiration, Personal

Dream On

August 6, 2010 Ashley Pariseau 9 comments

Every time that I look in the mirror
All these lines on my face getting clearer
The past is gone
It went by, like dusk to dawn
Isn’t that the way
Everybody’s got their dues in life to pay

Yeah, I know nobody knows
Where it comes and where it goes
I know it’s everybody’s sin
You got to lose to know how to win

Half my life
Is in books’ written pages
Lived and learned from fools and
From sages
You know it’s true
All the things come back to you

Sing with me, sing for the year
Sing for the laugh, sing for the tears
Sing with me, if it’s just for today
Maybe tomorrow, the good lord will take you away, yeah

Yeah, sing with me, sing for the year
Sing for the laugh, sing for the tear
Sing with me, if it’s just for today
Maybe tomorrow, the good Lord will take you away

Dream On Dream On Dream On
Dream until the dream come true
Dream On Dream On Dream On
Dream until your dream comes true
Dream On Dream On Dream On
Dream On Dream On
Dream On Dream On

Sing with me, sing for the year
Sing for the laugh, sing for the tear
Sing with me, if it’s just for today
Maybe tomorrow, the good Lord will take you away
Sing with me, sing for the year
Sing for the laugh, sing for the tear
Sing with me, if it’s just for today
Maybe tomorrow, the good Lord will take you away…

Categories: Inspiration

Crystal Renn Criticized For Losing Weight

By now, many of us know of Crystal Renn. She is the ex-anorexic high fashion model turned proud plus size model and author. Beloved by many, she was praised for embracing her natural curves in her book, in interviews, and in mainstream fashion media, especially Glamour magazine, which she recently graced the cover of June’s issue along with Alessandra Ambrosio and Brooklyn Decker. The cover has gained quite a bit of attention in the fashion world, because on it, Crystal appears to be practically as thin as the other two women. Looking at other recent photos of Crystal, it does appear that she has lost weight. So why is this such a big issue? Ever since she was dubbed as a plus size model and has spoke on body image, there seems to be this expectation of her to stay that way. Now that she has lost a bit of weight, criticism has poured in from everywhere. There have been speculations about her relapsing and betraying the size acceptance that she once advocated. However, articles have reported that the weight loss is unintentional and due to the fact that she has been more physically active.

“She is not trying to lose weight at all,” her Ford Models agent tells PEOPLE. “She fluctuates between a 10 and a 14.”

“She went hiking in Patagonia for three weeks over the holidays and she firmed up and got a little smaller,” he says. “She has also been traveling like crazy and tends to be smaller when that happens.

Makes sense. Still, I can’t help but noticed how some people are still placing her in that shameful weight loss corner, and otherwise ignoring her when they once loved her as that awesome plus size model striking a pose for Glamour magazine.

What do you think? Does she have a social obligation to stay plus size?

Categories: Discuss

Gorgeous Celebs With Small Breasts

Breast augmentation is the leading form of cosmetic surgery for women, but this just goes to show that having a “perfect C cup” isn’t everything. Here are some gorgeous celebrities rocking A’s and B’s.


Natalie Portman


Debra Messing


Kate Hudson


Kiera Nightley


The Olsen Twins


Kate Bosworth


Cameron Diaz


Rachel Bilson


Julia Stiles


Ali Larter

Categories: Random

Updates

Just a few quick updates.

The Take Steps Walk was awesome! The trail we walked was beautiful and it wasn’t too terrible hot outside that day. We also went to the Midwest Reptile Show earlier that morning and bought a new female ball python, which currently makes 6 snakes all together. I haven’t gotten around to posting the photo to flickr yet, but hang tight.

It seems IlluminateMB’s server has crashed. :-( But I have definite plans to make a new board in due time, so please be patient, and if you are interested in helping me out with it and being a co-admin, that would be great! Just let me know.

Thanks to Melanie for the link to You’re A Grown Man. Haha! That site is great and made my day! Everyone should check it out.

Categories: Random, Site Updates

Take Steps Walk 2010

In honor of my friend Brian, I will be walking in the Take Steps for Crohn’s and Colitis Walk. The event is this coming Saturday, June 5th in Indianapolis. Take Steps is CCFA’s national evening walk and celebration and the nation’s largest event dedicated to finding cures for digestive diseases. It is a casual 2-3 mile stroll to raise money for crucial research, bringing us closer to a future free from Crohn’s disease and ulcerative colitis. Over 1.4 million American adults and children are affected by these digestive diseases. While many suffer in silence, Take Steps brings together this community in a fun and energetic atmosphere, encouraging them to make noise and be heard.

Your donation will help support local patient programs, as well as important research projects. This cause is very important to my friend and I appreciate your help in my helping him as we fight for a cure. In addition to donating, you can join me at the event if you are in the Indianapolis area. There will be food, music and activities. The more money we raise, the closer we will be to making life more manageable for patients who live with these diseases every day.

Click here if you would like to make a donation. If you have any questions or concerns, don’t hesitate to email me at missash03@gmail.com

Any donations, no matter how small, are greatly appreciated!

Categories: Causes

Social Vibe

I recently decided to register at Social Vibe. I have known about it forever and I’ve checked it out a couple of times, but have never bothered to sign up, until now. If you aren’t familiar, it is a social media tool that connects people with brands, empowering them to engage with sponsors and share branded content with their social graph to benefit a cause of their choice. Individuals make a positive, measurable impact for the charity of their choice just by completing branded activities. In just over a year’s time, over $700,000 for over forty different non-profits has been raised. The SocialVibe community seems to be most popular among celebrities and influential bloggers. It proves to be a great tool that allows people to use their influence to make a positive impact.

If you haven’t already noticed, I have added a badge on my right side column. I will soon be adding badges on my social network pages as well. The charity I chose is Children’s Miracle Network, which is an organization that raises funds and awareness for children’s hospitals and foundations throughout the world.My sponsor is Operation Smile.

The cool thing about the badge is that every time someone views a page I have with the badge on it, whether it be here on my website, my myspace, or anywhere else I post it, I earn points for myself on SocialVibe which can be redeemed for a variety of different perks and money for my charity. So just by visiting my site, my readers are helping me out and helping my charity. Readers can also additionally help out by clicking on my badge and it will take you to a page where you can complete a task that earns me points and money for Children’s Miracle Network. And it’s all completely free. How cool is that?

If this sounds like something you’d like to get into yourself, feel free to sign up and post the link to your profile in the comments and I’ll help you raise money for your cause as well.

Categories: Causes