Online Dating – How Should A Girl Avoid The Hookup Guys?

Yesterday, I woke up in the late a.m. and looked at my phone. I received a text from my friend. “I’m going to stop meeting guys online. They’re pissing me off.” I asked her what they were doing to piss her off. She then told me about yet another guy who was sending her unsolicited and graphic  images.

Not only that, she has told me stories of guys online that she has talked to who just act like jerks. It’s been hard for her to find a guy who is actually interested in dating or a possible relationship. Most of them just want to share dirty photos and videos and then maybe get laid at some point. She’s not about that.

I have done the online dating thing years ago in the early 00’s. I remember getting hit up by lots of idiots with bad opening lines and obvious trying hard to get laid material. I just ignored them most of the time. I did have some luck in meeting a couple of really great guys. Surprisingly, there were actually a decent number of guys who were legit and looking for dating or a relationship. But that was then. Now, things are different with all of these trendy sites and apps that everyone in town is using, and it’s hard for a girl looking for a relationship to find a guy that wants the same thing.

Since it’s been so long since I have been in the online dating scene, I am a little clueless on the subject of how to go about weeding out the guys that just want to hookup. Or is it hopeless?

Ladies, if you have any experience with successfully finding the right type of guy online, share your tips and stories. Guy’s opinions are welcome too. 

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26 thoughts on “Online Dating – How Should A Girl Avoid The Hookup Guys?

  1. I did a lot of online dating in the early 2000’s before finally meeting my husband in 2007 – 2008.

    Here’s my advice –

    1) It really is a numbers game. I am still friends with a few guys I met over 10 years ago, but I had to wade through so. many. frogs. If you can, develop a system for weeding the bad ones out quickly so you limit how much of your time you waste

    2) start playing an MMO if that’s your thing – I met my husband because we were in the same World of Warcraft guild.

    Happy hunting!

  2. The best way to avoid “Hook up Guys” is not to be a “Hook Up Girl”. Unfortunately as the men’s movement has picked up steam – due to the war on males conducted by second and third wave feminists – an increasing number of men in their prime dating years. Are choosing not to place themselves at risk of financial rape by dropping out of the dating game and going their own way so that the effect is that “Good Guy’s” are becoming quite rare and increasing harder to find.

    • If men are so concerned about financial “rape”, why do they keep insisting that women stay dependent on him financially during the marriage? If men were more accepting of women going to work and providing for themselves, they will find that those women don’t need or want any of their money even if they do get a divorce. That is just one of the possible consequences of wanting to keep women at home.

      • A wise man who does not want to raise a “Latch Key Child” will avoid dating any girl who isn’t serious about being a mother and is more interested in seeking self fulfillment in a career. An even wiser man chooses to avoid being “Financially Raped” by avoiding intimate relationships – especially the pitfalls of marriage – with women altogether.

        • So many anecdotal theories going on here. You know, I’m going to skip all that and just say that yes, he’s wise to go his own way, indeed. Hope he is happy being alone.

          • LOL Oh yes indeed the men who end up choosing the MGTOW lifestyle are indeed quite happy with their choice – especially since happiness does not require a female being in the picture. :) But the predatory women who make their living preying on unwary males are not the least bit happy in the least. {Sigh} Oh well too bad so sad. :)

            • Too bad, so sad? Yeah, that’s a happy mentality right there. When are mgtow actually going to gtow and stop looking for reasons to take cheap stabs at women?

            • Most likely when females stop taking cheap stabs at men – I myself have been married to the same woman for over thirty-two years – hence I just happen to know what I’m talking about – and wouldn’t waste two bits on the predators your generation has chosen to become.

            • Congrats on being married for that long. I just hope you can take into account that predators come in both female and male form.

            • Thank-you. Yes they do but while women demonize men the female predators fly underneath the radar and are allowed to get away with their crimes.

          • Actually it’s the man who holds the commitment. So it is the women who are alone. We frankly don’t care. Or – rather – the men who YOU are attracted to don’t care – because they got the pick of the litter.

            Doubt me? Go look and read any article or blog from a career driven woman who lives in Manhattan, or any major big city, where all the fields are leveled. The men have the PICKINGS.

            It’s merely a numbers game celektra.

            Again sorry to burst your bubble.

      • real men don’t want career women. I’m sorry it’s just not sexy nor is it in our blood to be attracted to such a phenonmenon. We like women who are feminine and like to be true mothers and act like women. Career driven women who act like men just aren’t sexy.

        Or at least they aren’t sexy to true men. The kind of men who YOU are probably attracted to.

        Sorry to burst your bubble, but it’s just the way we are built.

        Feminism is a complete utter failure.

        • “real men don’t want career women. I’m sorry it’s just not sexy nor is it in our blood to be attracted to such a phenonmenon.”

          I don’t know, man – that’s changing. More and more, “real men” seem to want whatever works best for the family. In my family, I’m the breadwinner while my husband takes care of the house and kids.

  3. I think it could depend on what sites she’s using. The guys who just want to hookup or get some fap material are more frequent on the free sites. If she’s serious about dating, ask her if she would consider signing up on one that requires a small monthly fee.

  4. My experiences in online dating were hit and miss. There were good guys, and then there were frogs. I started doing a little bit of an experiment with the frogs. Instead of ignoring them or getting lippy, I messaged them back and tried to coach them on how to approach a lady that would gain them more success. They were surprisingly cooperative, and I was able to help them out with other girls.

  5. I have had some luck. Not much though. I met my ex on Eharmony and the relationship didn’t work out but I have a best friend now who I share everything with. I scored a friend and it wasn’t a bad consolation prize. But I am guessing sites like OKCupid and Plenty of Fish is not the way to go, especially with things like Tinder. Those are for the hit its and quit its.

  6. your gender has created a culture in which being a “pickup artist” is in his better interests. Gone are the days that we need to commit to a girl to get sex. She regularly gives it up on the first date, in some kind of “empowered” feminist created movement.

    Gone are the days when girls held that card. Hell – these days we are having protests over slut-shaming – AS IF we aren’t supposed to pretend that is a bad thing? hahahah that whole thing is just hilarious.

    So the longer that you females go on pretending that being a slut is A-OKAY and protesting that it is not okay to (god forbid) SHAME such activity, this is what you get.

    Evidently you want to have your cake and eat it too. Doesn’t work that way Ashley. Sorry.

  7. My first question is how did these guys get her phone number? I only give out mine if we’ve talked a bit online and he seems like a good guy. Not that freaks still don’t get past this system but it weeds out the majority of losers.

    • Honestly, I don’t think it matters what site you’re using. It’s all about who you let talk to you. It was very freeing once I realized I don’t have to respond to or even look at every message sent to me. Most of them only say ‘sup’ anyway (those do not get a response). Remember, you get what you put up with. And protect your phone number! Emails can be deleted more easily, and even filtered right to the trash. As to all these people commenting about how women are sluts and how men don’t like career-women, guess what? You guys wouldn’t get a response from me on a dating site, because I only respond to people who are worth my time!!

  8. “real men don’t want career women. I’m sorry it’s just not sexy nor is it in our blood to be attracted to such a phenonmenon. We like women who are feminine and like to be true mothers and act like women. Career driven women who act like men just aren’t sexy.

    Or at least they aren’t sexy to true men. The kind of men who YOU are probably attracted to.

    Sorry to burst your bubble, but it’s just the way we are built.

    Feminism is a complete utter failure.”
    This guy is obviously a sexist man who is upset at women for not being exactly what they need to be. Nor would the woman he is with be treated with complete love from him because he wears the pants and it’s clear. When a woman knows how to pick men who will bow down and kneel down for them she can do whatever she wants and get away with it. It’s all in the confidence of the woman. Sex is beautiful and nothing to be ashamed of. Using women as a tool is what is wrong, but a woman shouldn’t be afraid enjoy herself! These are the kind of men who don’t make their wives orgasm. It’s wrong!!

    • Isn’t it cute how sad they are?

      Please, guys – keep whining and crying and telling me all about how I’ll never get a “real” man and I am doomed to be lonely and unhappy forever. Keep moaning about how feminism has failed, yadda yadda yadda.

      Meanwhile, I’ll go home to my husband and kids, to the house that I bought as the family breadwinner, have dinner with my family (that my husband cooked), then put the kids to bed and have mindblowing sex with my husband.

      Feminists: 1; Misogynists: 0.

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